I am having a series of horrible days
-I washed my cell phone in the washing machine
-I then put my cell phone in the dryer
-after drinking too much red wine I decided to register
at classmates.com for my high school reunion
-every divorce or never married middle age man in my high school
class has written me by email. Thank god we had a small class.
Thank god I no longer live in Maine.
-I responded to only one, come to find out Jim is not John Plant, the boy I held
hands with in second grade, but rather the one who threw spit balls at me in English class
-I had a dream I won Yale and then I woke up
-had a fight with my love
-and I think I’m catching a cold
Now I am scurrying off to bed to feel even sorrier for myself, if that’s possible
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1 comment:
Your horoscope, madam:
One good way to celebrate your astrological Season of Rapture would be to acquire the book Sexual Energy Ecstasy: A Practical Guide to Lovemaking Secrets of the East and West, by David and Ellen Ramsdale. Carry out any of the exercises between pages 333 and 339, including these: 1. Imagine that your house is burning down around you while you're making love; you're too blissfully engrossed to flee, and die in each other's arms. 2. As you make love, imagine you're dreaming, and will soon wake up. 3. Imagine that your lover's face keeps changing, becoming the faces that he or she had in past incarnations. 4. Make love with paper bags over your heads. Cut out holes for your eyes and mouths. 5. Imagine that you're making love to Jesus Christ, Mary Magdalene, Buddha, Tara, Kwan Yin, Krishna, Parvati, or some other enlightened one.
You are in the season of rapture, dear. Now, enjoy it, dammit. (smile)
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