Friday, March 11, 2005

those fat little ugly babies

My book hates me. I am trying not to take it personally, the way it changes order every time I turn around but today I figured out it was personal. The book does it to make me crazy. Last week I thought I had beautiful poems and today they are all fat little creatures with no home. I have changed the content 60 times and there is no order. I want to see it…I need to see it.

This was my first batch of rejections sending the manuscript out. I told myself there was no way it would get accepted right out of the box but I guess deep down I thought it might because that would explain the hole in my stomach when I opened the letter.

This too shall pass. Tomorrow I will wake up and send those ugly babies off again and hopefully this time they will stand next to each other and behave.

2 comments:

Anne Haines said...

Last week I thought I had beautiful poems and today they are all fat little creatures with no home.

Oh, I'm so glad this happens to other poets too! Last night I was going through my most recent few dozen poems and hated them all. I was all, "where are the incredible poems I had in here a week ago? I know I remember having incredible poems!"

Good luck -- may the ugly babies suddenly transform into beautiful swans. :)

Ana Božičević said...

You need to remember -- you get used to your poems almost through some kind of "marital habituation" -- but for others they will be fascinating strangers they can have a crush on. :)