Who defines us? On today’s posts at Victoria’s blog she noted that she was going to stop blogging b/c of comments from others. I have always loved that blog. She talks a lot about writing and how to get published, different schools of poetry and such. It is just nice to see someone on the other side of where I want to go (first book of poetry).
It also bothers me a great deal that we allow others to control and direct our behavior. Would I be this bothered if she just stopped b/c she was busy? No. Well maybe a little but I expect more from her and maybe that is not fair.
One of the negative things about workshops/blogs on line is that people say things about our work that they would never say in a real writing workshops or life. Yet sometimes that is a strength. I have been in writing workshops where people have been too “soft” and I feel like that is not being very helpful either and though I don’t agree with a lot of the banter that goes on, it does cause me to think and consider my own truth.
The thing is, (and everyone knows this thing but it takes time to travel from your brain to your heart) there are always going to be people out there who hate what you write and others who love it.
I have at time allowed people to define me and my writing. I have stopped writing for weeks because I lost a fellowship or a publication I really believed I deserved and somehow thought “this punishment” served some sort of purpose.
Maybe you are reading this and you are not a writer but everyone has things, people who define them. At what point do we as adults take over the definition of ourselves…change the rule books. Say this is who I am….and I don’t give a flying fluck….
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Part of the reason I don't have comments on my blog is because I don't want to people to say mean things to me. I also find praise uncomfortable. And reading hurts my eyes.
That plus I just haven't gotten around to it.
Of course, these are all reasons for not sending work to publishers, too.
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